Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!




02/17/2014 at 10:00 AM EST




Footloose's 30th Anniversary: Here's Twerkloose


Twerkloose starring Miley Cyrus


Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty



A young rebel rides into town alone and starts a dancing revolution against the wishes of the local elites, who think this youthful hedonism is all too much – the plot of the Kevin Bacon classic Footloose clearly bears no similarities to the world of today.

But wait.


As the film that encouraged us all to cut our feet loose celebrates its 30th anniversary on Feb. 17, it's time to imagine a modern update. No, not the 2011 remake that is – unconscionably – the No. 1 Google result for "Footloose."


Instead, let's envision a different new Footloose, one that stars the one woman in America whose dance moves (solo or otherwise) can still cause a stir.


We've taken the trouble to mock up some storyboards for this million-dollar idea below. Check them out, and then give us a call, Hollywood!


Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




Miley Cyrus steps into Kevin Bacon's high-waisted jeans and tank top for this Footloose remake.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




After tiring of a life of fame, Cyrus moves to a small town where twerking is banned and tries to make friends.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




But it doesn't take long before her tongue-waggling behavior starts turning heads.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




Cyrus's tractor-riding know-how helps her get by, but is it enough?
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

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After several twerk-less weeks, Cyrus finally finds a place to release her moves in private.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




Reinvigorated by the power of twerk, Cyrus decides to make a change.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




She forms a plan with her supportive father to have twerking accepted.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




In the end, Cyrus brings her best moves to the town dance and blows the locals away.
Happy 30th Birthday Footloose: It's Time to Cut ... Twerkloose!| Footloose, Kevin Bacon, Miley Cyrus

Photo Illustration by People.com; Photos provided by Everett; Getty




The kids are finally allowed to twerk! Everybody cut loose!
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