Patti Stanger Blogs: How to Make Up After Break Up

Celebrity Blog

By Patti Stanger

09/27/2012 at 03:15 PM EDT

Love and relationship expert Patti Stanger is a best-selling author and the star of Bravo's Millionaire Matchmaker. She'll be blogging regularly for PEOPLE.com about celebrities and relationships. Get Patti's advice on all things love, sex, relationships, astrology, fashion, beauty, recipes and more on PattiKnows.com .

Everyone is wondering ... will Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart eventually get back together?

Reconciling after so much drama probably won't be easy and will definitely take hard work. But here are three things to consider for couples who want to rebuild a lasting relationship.

1. Ignore your heart

During messy breakups and makeups, your heart is your worst enemy. Instead you need to become BFFs with another organ – your brain. It's your brain that's going to help you think critically and make smart decisions. Your heart is just going to want you to find somebody to spoon. Right now, both Kristen and Rob's hearts are probably telling them to run back into each other's arms and pretend nothing ever happened. You and I – and anyone with a brain – know that's not possible. So, Kristen and Rob, ignore your hearts and think carefully if you decide to be together.

2. Get comfortable

Anyone who's been a victim of infidelity is going to have to take time to figure out what will make him or her feel comfortable and secure in a rekindled relationship. And anyone who may be asking for forgiveness is going to need to be flexible and figure out what will help his or her partner trust again. Renegotiating these new boundaries is going to be a whole lot of trial and error. Both parties will need to be patient with each other. It's definitely not going to be easy. They'll both have to keep their eyes on the ultimate prize of a solid and loving relationship.

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson July 22

Frank Micelotta / PictureGroup

3. Talk to an expert

Couples who are trying to get back together after a betrayal should seek help from a therapist – someone they both trust, someone out of the spotlight that can help monitor their progress, keep them from playing the blame game and keep them on track to mend their relationship. Without outside help, they are more likely to fall victim to temptation, to seek revenge and to fall apart again. A therapist who doesn't take sides just may be the key to saving true love.

Do you think Rob and Kristen should get back together?

Head over to PattiKnows to read more relationship advice and my astrologist's long-term prediction for Kristen and Rob.