11/27/2014 at 07:30 PM ET
Stewart Shining
If your Thanksgiving dinner is lacking in pie, it’s because the Obama family has a monopoly on all the pies in America!
After the First Family chows down on the turkey that was not pardoned for its crime of “having delicious bird parts,” as Last Week Tonight host John Oliver put it, they’re going to have some pretty incredible pastries!
The dessert menu, created by the White House’s first-ever female pastry chef, Susan E. Morrison, sounds incredible.
The President, his wife, Michelle, their daughters, Malia, 16, Sasha, 13, and the rest of their guests will get to choose from banana cream, coconut cream, pumpkin, apple, pecan and cherry pies.
(But really, why choose? Is six slices really too many?)
But will they really have room for pie after a Thanksgiving meal that includes thyme-roasted turkey, honey-baked ham, cornbread stuffing, oyster stuffing, braised winter greens, macaroni and cheese, sweet potato gratin, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and dinner rolls. We hope they’re wearing their comfy pants!
On Wednesday, the President decreed, in the White House’s most baffling holiday tradition, that turkeys Mac and Cheese would be pardoned and, having been spared “from a terrible and delicious fate,” will live out long, healthy lives at Turkey Hill, a farm in Leesburg, Virginia.
—Amanda Michelle Steiner, @amandamichl
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